You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Randomize
