Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
