True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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