Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
