When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Randomize
