You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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