so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
