The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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