I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize