you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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