I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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