he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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