the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
