There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I FOUND THE LEGS
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
