we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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