They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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