It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
PANTIES FOUND
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