i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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