Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
