i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
