He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
