Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
