some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
