just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Randomize
