Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
