U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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