first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
