Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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