Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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