the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
