Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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