Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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