ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
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