So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
