My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Your cock deserves a montage
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
