I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
