Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
