Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Randomize