I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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