question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
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