Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
