it hurts more in the daytime
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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