this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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