hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
