i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
In America we eat man semen.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
