I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Randomize