stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Randomize
