Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
If its not for food we ain't going out.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
