You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
