Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
